Relaxed.
I know, I know. There’s a lot of anxiety built up in a job seeker. There is so much at stake. So much to win, so much to lose. We’re generally not trained to be job seekers… we’re trained to do whatever it is that we do, but not be competitive, effective job seekers.
In most of my interviews I was anxious. I felt prepared, sure. I felt competent, and qualified, sure. But the risk was just so heavy, and I didn’t want to lose. I was focusing on winning or losing.
My last interview I was really quite relaxed. Of course, I wanted the interview, but I had gotten to a point where the interview was just a business meeting between peers and colleagues. I’m not naive to the point where I didn’t realize what was on the line, but I was mature enough to not have that drive my contribution to the conversation.
I can’t tell you to chill out… to relax. But I can tell you that if you practice the skill of being and acting relaxed, you’ll do better in your interviews. And your networking. And your branding and messaging.
The opposite of relaxed, for a job seeker, can be summed up in this post, from 2007: Are You Bleeding?
Yes. And how can you learn to be relaxed in job interviews? Mental practice, a.k.a. visualization. In your imagination you can be however you want to be – and your brain and body learn from that as if it actually happened. https://theakelley.com/mental-practice-for-interviews-part-1