This last week I had some interesting experiences with people who communicated in a poor way.
In both situations, they had communicated “this is me,” and the way they did it did not justice to who they really were.
We have been trained in our culture and out society to play ourselves down. We joke about our selves, we diminish who we are, because we don’t want to come across as bragging, or self-degrading. Sometimes we do that because we are “humble,” which is a virtue, or course. Sometimes we do it because going back too far in history, to something awesome we did, is too far away. Sometimes we down-play our strengths because it’s just what we’ve heard other people do, or we don’t want to get into the whole story, or nobody will really care or understand… or a host of other reasons.
This is a poor exercise. We shouldn’t do this. We don’t help others understand who we are, and how they can help us, and that if they do help us they won’t be embarrassed because we really are that good.
If you are that good, OWN IT! Believe in yourself!
In a job search we get beat up. We start off badly (wondering what we did wrong, or could have done better, to have kept our last job), and then we have a fair amount of rejection to wade through… this might be our first time experiencing this… and we don’t know how to take it.
I got so low that, at one point, I didn’t think I was qualified to work at our local fast food restaurants. That, with my degree in Computer Information Systems and an MBA, bilingual, great experience and great titles… but the rejection had wore me down to a point where I had lost any confidence in my value or capabilities.
I have one tip to help you fix this: brainstorm your past accomplishments. Carve out 2/4/8 hours, go somewhere with NO distractions, and write down any accomplishment you have ever had in your entire life. Go through this process and remind yourself that you have greatness… that you are great, that you have value to offer. This single exercise would have changed many things in my job search.
Are you brave enough to take this time and do this exercise?