Waiting stinks. Especially for someone with my personality.
How do I wait while not doing the job? How do I not become too emotionally invested in this, only to be let down and have to move on?
Bury myself in any work. Transitioning my duties to Liz, finishing up some projects, chatting with the team about the possible changes, looking at other jobs…
Ugh. Something switched. No other job, no other company, was interesting. I couldn’t imagine myself doing what I was looking for (product management) anymore. I couldn’t image myself working at any of the companies I had targeted anymore. Even the two companies that were really close to my house had no appeal. If I had to work at them I would, of course. But, the idea of not working at BambooHR was becoming unthinkable.
I was getting hooked. Hook, line, and sinker.
Not a good place to be, if you want to negotiate. Or, if you don’t get the offer.
I knew it, but I didn’t know how to not go there.
It felt like it was right, and it was going to happen. But what if it didn’t?
I wouldn’t be prepared for that. More prepared than 12 years ago, but it would still be a hit.
What could I do?
Not much. Wait. Try to keep busy. But with a mind that was mush it was hard to do anything but hope, and wonder, and try to keep self-doubt away.